Welcome to my blog once again and today we’re going to talk about my girl: Meghan markle AKA Duchess of our Hearts!
As many of you have probably found out by now Meghan Markle and her husband Prince Harry have decided take a few inches back from the royal lifestyle. If you have followed the monarchy like I have, then you know Queen Elizabeth II has a lineage of relationships built on love.
From Queen Victoria I to Queen Elizabeth II love has been a common theme in this family. If you are wondering how or why Queen Elizabeth II gave approval for Meghan markle and Prince Harry to live outside of the throne look no further then her father’s brother who was once King of England.
It should come as no surprise that Prince Harry is committed to that same kind of unyielding love when it comes to his wife and child. I think people forget the Prince Harry it’s not directly in line for the throne. Since Prince William has two small sons it really takes a lot of the pressure off of Harry and lets him focus more on his lifestyle.
There are people who are very upset about the couple’s wish to move outside of tradition. I support the Queens opinion on the situation because everybody have a light. Perhaps Prince Harry and Meghan’s light will be better shown outside of the UK.
In my opinion, both Meghan and Harry are doing what’s necessary to raise her son in a therapeutic environment. I often wonder about our president’s children and how they fair. We watch the children of our presidents mature whole terms, sometimes up to 8 years.
In case of royal families their children never seem to get out of the spotlight, imagine how damning that can be if the spotlight seems to be frequently jaded? For a lot of people, I think the UK seems like it was a Utopia for minorities, if you are not from the UK. According to the history books slavery ended in the European countries before it ever ended in the United States. We even had black people who went to live abroad to get away from hate crimes here at home.
I think the treatment that Meghan Markle has received has been somewhat shocking for Americans due to our perceptions on the UK. The media from the onslaught of Megan’s pregnancy down to probably the last 24 hours has been nothing but critical of Meghan Markle and Harry. I know people don’t want to use the term bullying because bullying is such a ugly word, but the media has been vicious. I’ve not seen the type of treatment The Duchess and the Duke of Sussex encountered passed on any other member of the Royal family.
Ironically, this was the family who could survive such a feat due to their strong history of listening to their hearts. In a way, we are just watching history repeat itself! Love gives us the courage to move when others would have been immobilized in sorrow.
Interracial marriages still face problems that many people do not truly understand. I think many people are under the impression that interracial marriages are fully accepted now because we see more couples in interracial relationships. However, what many people do not see is the struggles that still exist surrounding the couples on a day to day basis. Just take the gallery that I use for my blog pictures for example. There were plenty of pictures showcasing loving relationships, but hardly any of them were of interracial relationships.
When Meghan Markle married Prince Harry over a year ago many like myself were over the moon! It was a win for love and one more nail in the coffin for racism, so we thought. You see more couples that choose to marry outside of their race today, but what you do not see is the racism that comes with that choice. I recall the first time I witnessed issues stemming from my marriage some years ago. We went to a retreat near Big Bear which showcased how couples were supposed to communicate with each other. After our lessons were over, the couples would all head towards the cafeteria and mingle. My husband and I weren’t approached by anyone and to make matters worse later that night we had to share the room with a couple that seemed to be fixated on what being black meant. Later on we would get looks from others. We would also have incidents were certain people would try to pick at the spouse that wasn’t the “correct” race.
What we are seeing today with The Duchess of Sussex and The Duke of Sussex is the real face of acceptance. Nobody wants to admit to being a bigot, but with the curtains now pulled back, we are seeing that bigotry is alive and well. Don’t get me wrong, we have made advances in gaining the right to marry who we want to marry. However, attitudes are still somewhat jaded by many when it comes to interracial marriages. Do you recall the commercial that sparked a debate on interracial marriage just 6 years ago.
Pick any high profile couple that happens to be married to someone outside of their race and ugly comments are not far away. After Matthew McConaughey married Camila Alves there were comments about how he could have done so much better. Never mind she is drop dead gorgeous, but some still felt that she was not fit to be his wife because she wasn’t white. Comments were made after Serena Williams married Alexis Ohanian and so on. Anytime you see a interracial marriage, get ready to see ugly comments. People have been called race traders, nigger lovers, mud sharks, Oreo cookies, and other hurtful names.
The best part of it all, at least in my opinion, is that interracial couples are increasing at a higher rate. My soon to be son-in-law is white and my other daughter’s boyfriend in Chinese. The hate hasn’t scared people away from being people. It shows that even though racism still occurs, it isn’t turning people away from wanting to be with the ones they love. As for my relationship, the looks and the ignorance made us stronger as a couple. The harder people looked us, the tighter we held onto each other. It was us against the world and it has been that way for almost 23 years now. So, let’s hope The Duke and Duchess learn how to embrace to power of love and true unity because their love is a love that will be tested. However, pressure creates diamonds, so let the hate keep coming, their love will just keep shining.
I remember some years ago watching special news reports flash across the TV about killings in Israel near the Gaza Strip. At that time I wanted to travel to Israel, but the violence was very offsetting. It was a battleground and every time you turned around special news reports were breaking in and out of programming.
I recall this one picture that was taken at a market with bodies all over the place and another of a blown up bus on the street. While my heart ached for the families involved on both sides of the conflict, I felt a small amount of relief because I lived in America.
It has now been about 48 hours since I last saw the video of people laying in the street, parking lots, and running for their lives right here in this country. We no longer look like the America I once knew, we look like a war torn country on the verge of catastrophe. Living in America, I do not think we have ever had to really worry about our daily outings.
Yet, the killing at Walmart’s rips deeply at my soul because it shows how far we have fallen. There will be some that want to blame Trump, others who want to blame Democrats, but let me be the first to say, I as a blogger could have done more to heal the current wounds of hate. I could have spoken a little softer, been a little friendlier and let down my guarded wall to prevent misguided feelings.
We have known that America has been on the verge of chaos for a while now. I will just name a handful of the shooting that have happened in the last 2 and a half years. In 2017 Stephen Paddock killed 58 people in Las Vegas and wounded over 400 more. Prior to that Congressman Scalise was shot and nearly killed while he and other members were practicing for a game. In February of 2018, The Parkland shooting took place which resulted in 17 people dying with two survivors committing suicide this year. Some of these shooting were racial while others were political, but the results were the same. They left the country stunned and heartbroken.
I want all Americans and even those who might not be Americans to be able to feel safe. Nobody should fear going to the store, having a bite with friends, or sending their children off to school. We need gun laws preventing assault weapons, better means to attaining mental health care, and firm mandates for social media companies that do not report threats immediately. Just as teachers, medical personnel and firemen have to report child abuse, so should Facebook, and other social media companies be forced to report potential dangers.
I remember growing up in school standing in the lunch line
behind two very popular girls. As I patiently waited for my spot to reach the
lunch lady, I heard one of the girls ask the other girl a question. She asked
the other child who looked like me, why didn’t she like me. Of course, I
immediately positioned my body so I could hear the bulk of the conversation.
This was a question I wanted to know because it was odd always being the person
being left out of conversations, celebrations and even down right hated at
times. At least this is how I felt because to a young child all those things
help to make up our social collage.
So, back to the memory! She leans in and tells the other
girl that I wasn’t like them. I didn’t talk like them, act like them, or even
look like them. Now this was a little confusing because I was most certainly
black. My parents were black, my sisters were black, so how was I so different?
Well, I guess if we entertain the not talking like them, perhaps there was a
little validity in that comment. My parents wouldn’t allow me to listen to rap
music and at the time I was growing up, rap music was popular. A lot of the
slang that children used back in those days, I couldn’t use. Once again, the
rule was to leave the extra at the door. I most certainly grew up black, but my
parents raised me differently than most of the children, due to their age. My
parents came from another generation which really focused on how people were
perceived by the public.
All sorts of hell lived in my house, but the public never
knew. As the students were saying I wasn’t black enough, my parents were
teaching another lesson all together. They
were teaching me about black limitations. So, when I came home crying over my
favorite teacher who had just died in a car wreck the night before my world grew
even more confined. I was told that I shouldn’t be crying for the white woman
because she didn’t really care about me, add that on top of the you can’t be
this or that because you are black ,and you have the perfect confusion sundae.
I had enough around the age of 18, so I left the confusing
small town behind with all the confused people in it. Sadly, I see those same confusing
outlooks being washed over the black race today. People are telling us that we
can’t be Republicans because we are black, or that we can’t be racist since we
have no control. I’ll calling out both ideas today because both are wrong. My parents
preventing me from grieving over a white teacher was racist. I do not care what
anyone tells me or you about racism because it isn’t a one race problem.
Racism is like a cloud that spreads over the world that brings
down an invisible layer of confusion. It hinders the way we treat each other
and perceive each other. It makes enemies out of people who know nothing about
each other due to the stigma attached to the unknown group. Ignorance is the
perfect environment for racism to grow. It’s like a perfectly lit breeding ground
for misinformation and chaos. When we start seeing ourselves as people without
limits race seems to disappear into the background. Does that mean all racist moments stop happening?
Of course not, but it means we learn how to move through life without constantly
tripping over the vines of racism. The vines in many ways are the obstacles
that we place down. Perhaps, we tell ourselves that we will never be able to
get the job because they are looking for someone who looks like her, he’ll
never ask me out because I am not his race, or people who look like me do not live
in houses like that.
Anyway, you cut it, hiding behind race creates invisible borders.
Life isn’t about being boxed into any group, it’s about being able to weather
storms. If you are looking for what divides us, look at those people preaching division.
They are the dividers of the world, but that doesn’t mean we have to let them
make us act out that way. As always think with your heart, it isn’t white,
brown or black it’s just human. Don’t let certain ideologies pave your way just
because it is a norm. Fight for understanding and the right to choose.
I wish I could tell you that cases like the Central Park 5 no longer exist. I wish I could tell you that all investigations are done with fairness, but I won’t insult your intelligence today. The movie When They See Us is a painful reminder that not everyone with a badge or a title can be trusted to work for the betterment of their community.
I’m sure if you have been following my blog, you know my story. I turned in my badge over a year ago after I saw railroading techniques being used to trap minorities. It takes a strong person to go against their livelihood. In my situation, I transferred from another region because I wanted to move my family to a smaller town. I thought a smaller town would offer better people and a better foundation for my girls.
After I got here, I immediately started seeing issues. I came from a big city and investigations there weren’t easy. I was nearly raped, threatened by a weapon, and was even surrounded by racist at one point. Yet, I loved my job and I could see the good in helping out my community. I had a supervisor who clearly looked out for her community, she cared about trying to help children, and she cared about helping their families learn to rehabilitate in difficult situations.
I came here with background in removing children from parents using cocaine and meth. I also had the removals that resulted in removals from people who no longer wanted to be parents. After I got here, my very first case was a case involving an African American mother from another state. She had relatives here and a mother hours away. Not only did she have a mother hours away, the children had a father who was trying to see how he could get in route to pick up his children.
While I was trying to work with the family on finding a solution my supervisor was trying to push a removal on the mother due to her getting arrested. Keep in mind, there was an aunt living in the household and people who could have been here within hours. The policemen looked at me and asked me if I was really going to let that happen, and I reaffirmed them that I would do everything in my power to stop it.
After going back and forward with my boss I was able to get her to work with the family until we were able to get the father or grandmother headed in our direction. The thing about removals is that they often do not get overturned. They last for at least a year and children are forced to stay in foster care. So, if there is a family member, we were taught to do everything within our power to unite that child with their family, but in this unit they didn’t do that. Even after this case was ready for closure, and the female had her children back in another state my supervisor was trying to get the state to take action against the mom. The state politely let us know that the mother was doing good and to bud out at this point.
I have always been very careful about removals due to the stress that it places on the children. I removed only when I needed to and questioned anything that looked fishy even when it wasn’t my removal. A few cases later I came across a female who had just gotten out of the hospital. She tested positive for marijuana. Marijuana is not something that we remove for in the state of Texas. People get a quitting marijuana packet due to it not being crack or meth.
When I gave her an oral swab her medications that she had been given at surgery showed up. Keep in mind she had just been released from the hospital and her urine didn’t have any traces of those drugs nor the baby’s prior to or while giving birth. I still went on and confirmed with the nurses as to the type of medication that this lady was given. My supervisor wanted me to remove once again due to her results coming back positive even though she knew she had just had a c-section.
She swore up and down that a positive meant she had used something. I told her to google the medication and see what positives would show up and she did, but she still didn’t want to believe me or the medical professionals. I informed her that I wouldn’t be doing a removal because this mother wasn’t doing anything that warranted a removal. I even gave her another drug test which came back negative two days later.
I have always had issues with investigators who removed and placed kids into foster care without trying to locate family members. She and others stated that it took too long. The process could take hours, but it was still worth it if you could keep the family together and maintain safety. She talked about how she would talk only to PDs who would lean towards removals because she didn’t want to do family placements. Again this is killing the families, but she didn’t care. Once she joked about being the Removal Queen. All I could hear was I’m messed up so many families due to not wanting to put in extra time on family placements.
We already knew that in most cases that minorities were targeted by false calls. Did you know that only 15 percent of CPS cases are real abuse? That means that 85 percent are lies and anyone can call in on people. While we have had some cases that were real, we have had so many more that were nothing more than vendettas.
Here’s the cold hard truth about cases in the black community and Spanish communities. When people look to remove often times these families will not be able to get their children back. If they have any sort of record dealing from old cases, criminal cases or people in the house with any central registry case they will be voided out as a potential caregiver. There are so many minorities with charges on them due to possession of marijuana, criminal trespass or failure to identify. Then if that doesn’t get them there’s a case on them for being victims of domestic violence.
They changed the regulation on domestic violence about 1 yr or 2 yrs ago. Prior to that if you were involved in a domestic violence relationship and were a victim they could put a reason to believe on you. So, the victim would get victimized twice. In some states they still do this, they still charge the victim with a reason to believe which knocks them out for any job dealing with children, or elderly. It also prevents them from taking family members if children are ever removed in the future.
I finally quit my job because of a case that should have been a removal, but my boss didn’t want to believe the children who were the victims in the case. I worked the case with at least three other law officials from two other states. The parent was a runner and drug abuser. She was grooming her children to be sexually abused while their father was looking for them. The father spent time in prison for manslaughter only because the state didn’t have a law on the books for self defense. I found out everything about the dad. He was a good hardworking citizen, paid his dues, took parenting classes, and even earned certificates. He had held down a job, his only true crime was being black and trying to stop a white man from killing him.
I found out that he had been looking for his children for years while the mother was letting them get beaten and molested. So, I let him take his children and my boss knew this, but you better believe she lied to the program manager about it. The program manager who was just as crazy as she was wanted us to get the kids back. Here’s the issue, because they didn’t want to remove those kids, they would have went back to the mom and the abuser. So, there was no way in hell I was going to do that. I called the dad told him to get a lawyer. Needless to say, anything else would have been just as crazy as the prior cases, so I quit soon after that case.
This father wasn’t going to be able to protect his children because of a conviction he got due to him trying to defend himself. He was already victimized by the system once and then we were going to let his children become victims of the system again. If you are poor, black or mentally ill the system will not work for you as it would for someone with a different stack of cards. Your only hope is to get a person who cares. When They See Us might be about the Central Park 5, but the issue is that, the stain of racism has soaked so deep into the fabric of what and who we are. It is in outcomes of child abuse cases, criminal cases and even family courts in some arenas. We have to understand that the fight isn’t over. There’s still work to be done.
What if we are welcoming nothing less than a Trojan Horse? While the caravans might consist of some families, a large part of these caravans make up males and children that often times come without parents. I call on us to use common sense when we talk about Immigration. Many of the people who are leaving these countries happen to be what we would call kids, so ask yourself, are we welcoming runaways? We are talking about information that’s coming out of those countries that specify that the majority isn’t made of up of families, but people old enough to work and teens are a vast number of people. Perhaps this is the reason you see so many young men when you look at the news in regards to the caravans on many news outlets.
We are also looking at a staggering amount of people coming from these countries, so much of a number, that these nations are now getting together to see what they can do to maintain infrastructures. Think back to what’s going on in Venezuela today and how Russia is now stationed on their doorstep. Why do we see such a young group of people coming to America?
Easy, during our youth we are sometimes more likely to believe in fairy tales and promises made by rich people. So, if some great person comes up to you and tells you that they know a place that will help you to get rich fast, and that they are willing to help you get there; you would say, sign me up. This isn’t about racism, it’s about protecting our neighbors and looking out for our country, at the same time. We are not saying we do not want people to come here and have a great life, but we are saying there needs to be a reason for the life change, and it shouldn’t be a move due to someone trying to hinder our way of governing.
As for you guys that keep talking about crime and danger, I ask you one simple question? If danger was the main problem, would that caravans make it to America? Many of these people would be killed in route and trust me, that would be covered all over the news outlets because it would show the real need for their journey being a journey of safety. The only violence we hear about sadly are the incidents being committed in the caravans, so try to focus on the real issue at hand. Someone is destabilizing these countries and we need to know why.
At the current rate, Central America and South America cannot continue to see the constant exodus of their citizens without their countries having to take comfort in the arms of a stranger. We must find a better way to help those nations end the mass immigration and maintain our dignity. Most of all, we must protect our neighbors such as Central America and South America from becoming extensions of other countries that look to hinder the way we govern. It might be Central America at the border today, but a year from now, it could be Russia.
This morning we are going to look at how destabilization throws a country into economic hardship for centuries. Most civilizations are started with basic needs which are normally the resources that help to make up the foundation for supporting the occupants around the area. These needs include food, governing body, workforce, and in most cases religion. We’ve seen throughout history how the absence of one can soon throw another area into the turmoil. It’s like a car, you can’t drive it without the alternator.
Let’s take Africa for example, during slavery a vast number of young men and women were sold into slavery. The results of slavery created a large gap in potential workers, protectors, and skills for the continent. In the years that followed slavery, Africa would soon be thrown into numerous tribal wars, racist governments, genocides and famines crippling entire populations. One could say the absence of so many people set the country up for a near imminent downfall. It opened to door for crime.
The situation in Honduras reminds me of the African trade in many ways. People are no longer bringing people over on boats, but someone is helping to move these people from their country to America. The sad truth of it all, is that they are doing to their country, what was done to Africa many many years ago. By migrating to the United States or even Mexico they are helping to set their country up for a devastating blow that will be felt for generations to come.
If there’s crime in those areas, it is because the very people who were able to defend it, went away. Slave traders didn’t pull up on the shores and take them from their families, they went willingly. Many of us have our different reasons for feeling the way we feel about immigration, but I think it helps to chip away at the very essence of a country. I’ve always felt a ping of sadness when it comes to not knowing anything about my ancestors. I’m a little jealous when people mention that they were able to go visit areas that were once owned by their ancestors. To think of someone willingly giving up who they are, reminds me of what many of us African Americans, never had. We never had a choice. So here we are today. I’m proud to be American, but I also know what my ancestors gave up. I know their struggle was real and given a choice, they would have made their way back to Africa.
So, when you think about immigration, think about the country and remember the lesson of Africa. What takes the place and how does that entity set the course for the nation? Are we helping to destabilize an area for selfish reasons, such as the quest for cheap labor?