Support Doesn’t Mean You Have To Agree

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I have been sitting on something for a while now. I wanted to share it with you, but I was afraid of how it would be taken. About a month ago my daughter came to me and said she was bisexual. It was a little surprising because she has liked guys forever. Guys are plastered all over her wall and on her phone. I asked her when did she start liking girls and she said maybe a month ago, then said months ago. I then asked well what did she mean when she said she liked girls and how did she know that she was bisexual. She then told me whenever she saw movies with girls kissing that those movies made her feel funny inside.

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I went on to ask what do you mean funny inside? She then stated that she found girls attractive. I informed her that just because she found girls pretty didn’t mean that she was bisexual. I told her I find a lot of women pretty, but that doesn’t mean I want to be with them. I asked her if she wanted to have sex with girls, and she frowned. So, of course by this time, I am paying close attention to the frown. Why was there a frown?

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So, then I asked her again, what makes you think that you are Bisexual? Keep in mind one of her best friends at the time was bisexual and the other was gay. She replied that she knew it just because and then stated a mouth full of other things that confused both she and I. I told her to just wait and give it some thought because what might seem like the thing to be today might not seem like the thing to be a week from now.

Well a few days ago she reported that she was back with her ex boyfriend and of course I asked about the bisexual thing that she had brought up about two or three weeks ago. She stated that she loves her boyfriend and that she isn’t bisexual after all. It got me thinking about the time I went out with a girl as a teenager. I am not sure why I did it, but I did. However, I was never forced to marry the idea of being gay or bisexual. I think sometimes we inadvertently force our children into being something that they might not be because we want to seem cool and supportive.

Perhaps, the best thing we can do is listen and give our guidance. It’s funny we give guidance when it comes to college, money, careers, but for some reason we try to shy away from talks about sexuality. If our children are going to commit to anything, they need to understand the full meaning of what they are making a commitment to. I can’t promise that she might not come back in two weeks wanting to date girls, but I can promise that she has a clearer understanding of what it means to be bisexual. “I see it all the time!” In my opinion is never a reason to do something. It only made me think that she was confused.

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I guess in the end I look at it this way. I am not arranging a marriage of any sort on my children, nor would I arrange an identity on them. If we talk about something and it is clear that this is who they want to be, then this is who they will be, but if I see confusion, it is my job to call it out. Right or wrong, I am mom.

Measure The Authenticity Of The Messages From Politicians

This has been a crazy week, but as it ends, I want you to do something for yourself. I want you to start measuring the messages that you hear from the people who are trying to gain your votes. Think about their cities, states, districts, and how their citizens are fairing under their guidance. Look at the type of laws they are working on while they are serving in Congress. Are they running for office and leaders in high crime areas? We would want to see bills that would help reduce crime and poverty in those areas. You would also want to see them introducing bills that help with healthcare, education and criminal justice reform depending on your location.

Are they good at reaching out to people and lending a helping hand to help bridge relationships? Also Google their history to see if they have ever tried to get laws passed that actually helped people in their areas. Take California for example, it has the highest number of homelessness in our nation. If a candidate represents that area, I would expect to see bills introduced with the intent to get the people off the streets. If not, I would conclude that they didn’t care, and would give my vote to someone else.

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This week one Congresswoman will try to do away with measures that will help to keep people safe. As a former investigator, I can tell you some areas need all the safety they can get. Depending on the location, cops might not come to the rescue. Some apartment complexes were seeing all of their children placed into CPS custody because of the activity in those complexes. These families were surrounded by drugs, drug dealers, and prostitution. Those areas would really benefit from extra security measures such as facial recognition upon entry. It would cut down on rape, drugs, and sexual abuse because often times I do not think the apartments run good criminal background checks, if they run them at all.

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We want to make sure people are passing good laws that will help our neighborhoods and the children that play or should be playing inside of them. So, clear your mind and think about what’s best for YOUR family. At the end of the day, we vote in the people who either help to bring harmony to our cities or the ones that help to destroy them. Listen and research because your future is too important to risk.

Be Careful About The Service You Give, You Never Know Who’s Ordering.

Earlier this week I wrote an article about Uber and how it pretty much saved my life!! So, it saddens me to have to write this article about Ubereats. Now, my daughter is doing a YouTube series on food and restaurants. She ordered both Ubereats and Waitr to see which service offers the best service.

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Well, I have to tell you, I was surprised that Ubereats did not come out as the winner. Ubereats sent some random email about our acct and refunding us money because of some odd reason. So, we were left with questions as to the reason our order was cancelled. I looked in our account a little while ago and the money has yet to be refunded. I am not making a big stink out of 30 bucks, but I wonder what happened to the order.

Crazy enough, all of this went down while Ariana was making her YouTube video. So, now people will see Ubereats in a less favorable light. I will say this in defense of Ubereats! Most of the time we have always received our food, I think we have only had one other situation that resulted in us not receiving our food. Both orders were over 30 dollars that resulted in cancellations.

Anyway, a picture is worth a thousand words, or at least a YouTube video. Sorry, Ubereats!

You never know what the customer is doing so always be on your best behavior.

Dancing With Donald Trump

If you are anything like me, you are more than ready for 2020 to arrive and leave. One of the main reasons I can’t wait to see 2020 come and go is because we are in desperate need of new blood in Congress. We have two types of people occupying Congress right now. We have people unwilling to disturb the waters, and people who are jumping into the deep end of the pool, without knowing how to swim.

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Meanwhile, we have this issue with Speaker Of The House Pelosi and President Trump. If I didn’t know any better, I would swear that these two have a secret flirt affair going on. On one hand we have Democrats calling for the impeachment process to start. On the other hand,Speaker of the House Pelosi wants to see President Trump locked up.

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So, what am I missing? The last time I checked the president can’t be locked up without being impeached. If you aren’t going to start the process, repair your relationship and move on. The bickering and jabbing is starting to get old. Most of us just want to see results that benefit our country. We want to see a fair immigration system, better healthcare, a judicial system that works for all, and climate control.

We want to see an immigration system that does not destabilize countries that need each other. We also need to focus on making sure people have the right to healthcare and that they aren’t kicked off their plans due to preexisting illnesses. There is a mental health crisis in this country and nobody seems to want to talk about that. The truth is, treating mental illness is more expensive than treating asthma in some cases. I recall going to the doctor to schedule an exam for my daughter’s ADHD it was going to cost us over 300 with insurance. We aren’t even talking about the medication, we are talking about the mental health exam. Estimations show that we have at least 66 million people that are documented having some sort of mental illness problem occurring within 1 yr. https://www.nami.org/learn-more/mental-health-by-the-numbers

Those estimates are based on people that we track, there are millions more who are suffering from things and they will never go into a clinic. They will stay in the dark due to the fear of stigma attached to being mentally ill. Yet, we argue about gun control and forget about the very things that cause people to act out. If congress feels the need to proceed with the process of impeachment , then so be it. However, if there is nothing there, we need to move on and fix our issues as a country. We have seen enough dancing between Pelosi and Trump. If I want to be entertained, I will watch a dancing show.

Border Children Fate

As of lately we have been hearing rumors about children being rented and used a collateral in a ploy to gain access to America. By now most of us who have been following this story are also aware of the fact that children are being placed on birth control to make the journey to America. Millions of people are calling for the children to be united with their parents, however is that placing the children in harms way?

What we know for certain, is that most of the people traveling to the United States are men. In an earlier article that I posted, I gave links to direct sites in Guatemala breaking down the people and groups taking on the journey to America. If you read that article, you should recall that most of the people were young working men while another large group happened to be children. The third group was made of families traveling with their children.

In some cases mothers have been seen telling reporters that they have had to place their children on birth control due to the real threat of sexual assault. Keep in mind, these children weren’t placed on birth control prior to the journey which makes you question their level of safety. Now, with the latest findings we are learning that many of these child could have been exploited. The Hill reported that senators have been briefed on exploitation. https://thehill.com/homenews/senate/447288-dhs-official-warns-gop-senators-about-rented-babies-at-border

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Make no mistake renting children, using children as tickets to come over is a form of exploitation. ICE is designed to prevent and control exploitation of children and prevent further damage. However, with the enormous amount of people crossing the border, it is now a race to properly investigate who is a victim and who isn’t.

More than ever, the public needs to understand that our opinions do not surpass the need for safety in regards to these children. Our leaders need to start looking at this situation in a new light which means they need to see these children as potential victims instead of treating them like POWs. We must commit to fully understanding who the children are and if these children have been used as a means to gain entry into this country, we must protect them. The borders need to be secured until we understand what we are dealing with.

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Will The Nation Ever Trust President Trump?

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If Trump were to win in 2020 would the nation be able to support him as our leader? Watching President Trump interact with the Queen and her family this week made me think about how we see our nation as a whole. I would like to think that if he were to win the election fair and square that we would all be able to support him. However, I fear that there will never be a blanket of support due to his stance on certain issues.

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So, how does Trump differ on issues like immigration? President George W. Bush was friendly in terms of immigration. According to this article https://georgewbush-whitehouse.archives.gov/news/releases/2001/09/20010905-2.html we see that not only was President George W. Bush more open towards immigration, but he saw Mexico as an important ally. President George W. Bush went on to have more meetings with Vicente Fox like the one he had below. They often talked about Mexicans being willing to take on jobs that Americans weren’t willing to take. Perhaps, in some circumstances he was right.

 ” A Mexican proverb tells us that “Que tiene un buen vecino tiene un buen amigo” — “He who has a good neighbor has a good friend.”  Today, both our countries are committed to being good neighbors, and good friends. Friends deal in good faith, and disagree with respect.  Friends stick together, in good times and in bad.

The problems with our attitude in terms of immigration started when America went into a recession. Prior to that, I can’t ever recall having anyone talk negatively about immigration. I think we did what people normally do when they suffer, find a scapegoat. During times of chaos people often blame others for misfortune and sadly, the ones that took on the bulk of the blame came from the southern border. While drugs have been an issue for many years, we started to focus more heavily on those drugs and started playing the blame game in regards to jobs.

By the time Obama came into office we were dealing with millions of Americans out of work and an unknown number of illegal immigrants working in positions that once went to workers who now were standing in line at food banks. Not only were we looking at a shortage of jobs for American workers, but we were also looking at jobs that were pretty much tailored towards people who spoke Spanish which sadly placed American workers out of the running for positions. Obama was popular because of his stance on immigration. https://obamawhitehouse.archives.gov/the-press-office/2013/01/29/remarks-president-comprehensive-immigration-reform

We have to make sure that every business and every worker in America is playing by the same set of rules.  We have to bring this shadow economy into the light so that everybody is held accountable — businesses for who they hire, and immigrants for getting on the right side of the law.  That’s common sense.  And that’s why we need comprehensive immigration reform.  

Either way you look at it, both Obama and Trump have been trying to fix our immigration issue. The problem is that we are trying to fix a system that has been broken for too long. Immigration is now so bad that is it threatening the infrastructure of the countries like Honduras and Guatemala. We have to find balance for our future as well as theirs.