When The Bullying Lines Get Blurred: Nikocado Avocado Vrs Stephanie Soo

The Issue With Online Drama

If you’ve been with my blog for a year more then you know about my struggle with the effects of bullying. My daughter who’s now 18 was mob attacked when she was 12. The attack happened on a playground with 11 to 12 girls around the ages 11 to 13.

This was a show that Ariana did after the incident.

Now both of my children love watching YouTube and one is a fanfiction YouTuber. So, naturally I take notice to what they’re watching and who they are watching. Over the past few weeks I’ve noticed a feud going on between Stephanie Soo and Nick Avocado.

What is it showing the youth?

Now both parties have pretty much been going back and forth because of an incident that happened at Miss Soo’s house. I am not here take a side, but I must point out something that I’m finding very disturbing among comments directed toward Nickacado.

Negative comments only make matters worse.

Within the past 15 hours Nickacado alluded to the fact that he was seeing or had an appointment with a therapist. Rather or not you believe this to be true, or you believe it be fiction, I think everyone needs to understand that words have an impact on all of us. Regardless of your loyalty, you should never wish harm on another person.

So many times we downplay mental illness, or we downplay signs of depression. Some of us might even try to justify by stating that the person bought the situation on themselves. However, that isn’t reason to keep inflicting pain on an individual. It’s okay to identify with people, but when you take on someone else’s pain and turn it into your own you are crossing a line.

The YouTube community has to understand that young vulnerable children are paying attention to these feuds. While many of these feuds might prove to be entertaining, they can also be very draining for someone who’s been through very similar ordeals. You never know when someone’s going to look at a post, read the post which was intended for someone else, and all of a sudden have a trigger reopened with those very same words coming back to them.

If you or your child is a victim of bullying at this point, I would stay clear of the Nick and Stephanie Soo feud because at this point it, I see it as counterproductive. Finger pointing never made any situation better and it isn’t effective in rebuilding relationships. We want both parties to come out of this situation healthy and strong.

Chair Raiders Anonymous

Get to know the new section on Shellzonit.com called Chair Raiders Anonymous. The inspiration came from watching Hulu and seeing the random liquor adds pop up.

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We thought it would be a great idea to try some of the alcoholic beverages and rate them. In this category we will rate anything from games, shows. alcoholic beverages, to movies in the theater. This will only be a weekly rating with results coming out at the start of a new week.

We will start things off with Kraken Black Spiced Rum. The commercial shows Tom Payne from The Walking Dead sitting at a bar looking like a wet snack! Okay, I couldn’t help it, but with wet hair flowing down into his face he starts to unleash this story which turns out to be about the Kraken. In the beginning of the commercial we thought it was a preview of a new movie then it becomes clear that Mr. Payne is talking about rum.

The Kraken Black Spiced Rum comes in a cool looking bottle that looks like something out of a pirate’s movie. The rum is smooth and the taste of spice isn’t overwhelming. To be honest, it is one of the best spiced rums I have tasted in a long time. I normally only drink coconut rum. My husband who can’t drink liquor most of the time was able to drink the Kraken without incident. Normally he gags when it comes to liquor.

For those of you who have a hard time consuming rum, try mixing your rum with coke. If you get a chance to watch the commercials that stream on Hulu you will see a menu down at the bottom of the screen which will allow you to learn a few drinks with the Kraken. So, all in all, I would give the Kraken a thumps up! It is something that I look forward to buying again and we finished it in our first week. Let me know if you have any other drinks you would like us to try!

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Loving What You Do Makes Things So Much Easier

So, last week we posted my daughter’s episode for her YouTube channel and something magical happened. If you watch the video you will see her just come to life. For a while, cooking has been her coping skill especially after PTSD took over. It really helped to act as a caldron for the negative energy she was feeling.

It is so important to establish something positive when dealing with children who have been victims of bullying. We started her YouTube channel two maybe three weeks ago and since then she has stayed three nights at a friend’s house. Some of you might be like that’s not a big deal. Well, for her it was a big deal because prior to three weeks ago she had never felt confident to stay away from home, we are talking about 5 yrs of not wanting to be close to anyone other than us. Her friend was like you are 17 and never slept over anyone’s house and she was like nope!

So of course when her friend stayed over here, I might have went a little all out! I talk so much about what she has been through and this video just shows how she’s laughing and loving life. If you are dealing with children who were victims of bullying, remember being there is number one. Don’t try to push them into anything until they are ready. I might have suggested she try a food show, but it’s all her.

Living In A Racial Climate With Children

It shouldn’t be a secret at this point, we are living in a racial climate. Whether you are living in the United States or in the UK, at this point there’s no escaping race issues. So, with the weekend at our feet, I thought it would a good idea to leave you with this.

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We do not have to look like each other, hold the same credentials, practice the same religion, or even use the same vocabulary! We simply need to do one thing when it comes to weathering the storm. We need to understand that underneath it all, we are all the same. We all house emotions, have goals, and live in this world.

What inspired this post, some of you might be thinking! It comes from a conversation at the dinner table that was innocent, but very telling at the same time. We do not normally gather at the dinner table for dinner unless it is Christmas or Thanksgiving. Last night we decided we would try something new because we have been finding cups in the children’s rooms. So, after the chicken was roasted, we informed the kids that we would be eating dinner at the table.

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As we headed to the table and took our seats, one of the girls stated how we were being like white families. She then smiled and scooped a thing of potatoes on her plate. My husband looked at me and I in return looked back at my daughter. I informed her that when I was younger I never ate anywhere besides the dinning room. We ate dinner as a family. I didn’t know that children were seeing something like eating at the table or the lack of it, as a racial expectation. It was a teaching moment for not only us, but for the girls as well. The moment resulted in explaining that race has nothing to do with where we eat! We explained that perhaps culture played a part in what might be found on people’s plates, but that it wasn’t fair to conclude that certain groups shunned tables! Then it was on to the next topic which was about boys and sending inappropriate pictures. That’s a story for Monday! Have a great weekend.

If Only Food Could Cure Racist Hearts

Leave it up to kids to come up with the most simple forms of expressing love! I’ve just finished up my lunch for today, and all of the ingredients were purchased from the local meat market down the road because my babies want to show their support. It isn’t an American market, it is a Mexican market and the only one that sells taco meat worth anything in this area.

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To be honest, I couldn’t imagine the store not being here. Two weeks ago we found ourselves roaming the aisles of the Korean Market in a nearby city. Once again, I couldn’t imagine the market not being there.

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In the near future I plan to go back to the Indian Market to try out new spices and see if I can find anything that beginners like myself might be able to create. In my opinion, food gives us a glimpse of who people are. It is a comforting item but so much more. In any given neighborhood around the globe there’s something beautiful to be seen. There are spices to try, new smells to smell, and bottled up warmth waiting for those who need it the most.

Perhaps that is the reason I always tell people to hold on to what they have. My mother had so many recipes and was the best cook ever. However, I didn’t get any of that knowledge from her. Our special moments and my cherished memories all go back to her cooking chocolate pies, cookies, and casseroles.

I’ve found that my daughter comes to life in the kitchen much like my mother. Her shy demeanor goes out of the window the minute she starts talking about cooking. With that said, on a different note! We decided that we will help out stores that might not get much traffic due to the fears from our government. We will be frequenting the Korean market, Mexican markets, and Indian markets because they are part of our community. I’m sure our government will figure this mess out.

As always if you want to see Ariana’s newest YouTube video check it out below.

Be Careful About The Service You Give, You Never Know Who’s Ordering.

Earlier this week I wrote an article about Uber and how it pretty much saved my life!! So, it saddens me to have to write this article about Ubereats. Now, my daughter is doing a YouTube series on food and restaurants. She ordered both Ubereats and Waitr to see which service offers the best service.

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Well, I have to tell you, I was surprised that Ubereats did not come out as the winner. Ubereats sent some random email about our acct and refunding us money because of some odd reason. So, we were left with questions as to the reason our order was cancelled. I looked in our account a little while ago and the money has yet to be refunded. I am not making a big stink out of 30 bucks, but I wonder what happened to the order.

Crazy enough, all of this went down while Ariana was making her YouTube video. So, now people will see Ubereats in a less favorable light. I will say this in defense of Ubereats! Most of the time we have always received our food, I think we have only had one other situation that resulted in us not receiving our food. Both orders were over 30 dollars that resulted in cancellations.

Anyway, a picture is worth a thousand words, or at least a YouTube video. Sorry, Ubereats!

You never know what the customer is doing so always be on your best behavior.

Learning How To Add The Yes You Can Factor!

Sometimes it’s easy to get carried away with our definition of attainable. Perhaps, we were never told yes you can while growing up, so we do not know how to be supportive when our children need us to give those affirmations. To be honest, some of us might not even understand what it means to live in a world that showcases things as being attainable. So, let this be the theme of today.

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Take it from Thomas Edison and perhaps my favorite quote of all times. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Do not let a problem keep you down because there’s always another day. Earlier this week we talked about my car breaking down and how scary that whole situation was. There were times that I wanted to cry, yell, or even call the dealership and curse them out. However, my goal was to get home, so keeping a positive outlook was vital.

I have tried to pass that mindset to my children. It isn’t about how horrible things are, but it’s about how we can make them better. If we see our goals as attainable we will continue to walk towards them. I go back to the day I was in the living room with my mother. I was around the age of 9 and was mesmerized by anything with mummies in it. I wanted to be an archeologist and that is exactly what I told her! She looked at me and informed me that black people weren’t those things and to stop talking nonsense.

I wish I knew then the things I know now. Color does not define what we can and can’t do. It is the mindset giving birth to the idea of attainability. I can achieve this goal if I work for it, I will achieve this goal because I will work hard to achieve it. At lease that is the message I give my children. Today, I am happy to announce that my daughter has transitioned into actively working towards her goal in becoming a foodie.

What the makings of a dream come true below.

She’s even managed to get 2 subscribers! They are her friends, but they still count! Oh wait let me add one more to the mix! I forgot to subscribe.